Birthday Blues!

haven been writing for a long time liao.....really busy.......lots of my frens had been saying dat they hav nt seen me for a long time last saturday when they saw me........guess dat was when i realize dat i really hav to schedule my time so dat i hav leisure time.......

i am not a workaholic but i think i sleep too much........or maybe i should say, i sleep too much during the day but cant get to sleep at night........but when i am awake, i m alwaz working.........

hwever, i had been to a few performances n had seen some gd films lately.......guess dats quite an achievement for my extremely tight schedule.......anyway, i might be gg to india in june and i am really looking forward to it.

travelling has always been my favourite past-time but when i have the time, i have no money and when i have the money, i got no time........

although this year's birthday was almost like last year's birthday, celebrated at the pub my best fren is working but it was not as fun as last time........duno y but all my frens came separated n it was quite a chore to entertain all of them cos they dunno one another and i got to go from table to table cos a few of them came alone..........BUT i m gg to celebrate my birthday again with my best fren, we r gg to treat ourselves to a sumptuous meal and may whole nite-long of karaoke session in a room juz to ourselves!

dat would be fun!

Masks?

why does everyone love to tell lies? dun come bullshit about white lies! lies r juz lies!!!! is being straight forward so difficult? i am really tired of all this crap! u got to deal wif politics when u work, nw even when u r out wif ur frens.........politics r involved too!!! when did this type of 'political friendship start? i dunno........all i cum to realise is dat, i really hav to think twice b4 i speak to ANYONE......there is no guarantee dat the one u r toking to will nt spill on u! wat kind of world is this man? hw could u ppl out there take it? i m gg bonkers! really! everyone around me r becoming hypocrites........u nvr seem to noe whether a smile or laugh is genuine.......but who bothers? ME and only ME!!! everyone seems to be satisfied wif acts of friendliness but i cant...or maybe i should try to accept this and put on a mask to stop true feelings n expressions from displaying as well as to filter away political remarks n hypocritical smiles.........................

Loneliness.........................

seeing other couples spending time together, whispering sweet-nothings to each other, etc.....evokes loneliness in singles..................

seeing groups of friends laughing, studying, playing a fool in public like nobody's business, etc........evokes loneliness in those who have to reject invitations due to work until friends forget about them.................

seeing families spending time together.........evokes loneliness in those who left home or have no homes........

WAT IF
u r single but have lots of friends and a caring family, would u feel lonely?
u have no invitations from friends but showers of love, care and concern from ur family, bf or gf, would u feel lonely?
u have no home to go to but a shoulder to cry on and an emotional support whenever u need, would u feel lonely?

i had never been single for so long, 5 months, ever since i was 17, my 1st luv, so i will alwaz lament whenever i see couples n kept thinking about the most recent ex-bf. m i really dat in luv wif him? the ans is NO. i juz need someone to let me think abt.......stupid rite? anw, i started to accept n enjoy my singlehood a month ago, no need to report or seek permissions, hooray!!!
slowly, i put all my energy n zest into my work n rehearsals hoping to achieve something in the near future, however, this led to the neglect of my friends and nw even when i do meet up with them, i cant get into their conversation topics..............i think i m becoming a workaholic! OH NO!